I get hundreds of question each week and this is always one of them.
Can I use a pacifier? Is it safe?
Many parents have a love-hate relationship with the pacifier. Sometimes they save your sanity and then other times you want to burn all pacifiers you come across.
Before you start those fires, let’s get some clarity around pacifiers.
Many parents are confused about whether it’s a sleep tool or sleep prop and whether to introduce it or wean it. Or whether is even safe to have at all.
What is the recommendation for pacifiers anyway? Yay or nay?
I’m going to tell you right now that I LOVE pacifiers AT THE RIGHT TIMES. Yes, my love has conditions.
Why I say hell YA to sucking:
SIDS Prevention - The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends using a pacifier for all naps and night sleep. There is research that supports a significantly reduced rate of SIDS with pacifier use. The reason behind this is that it prevents babies from going into a deep sleep. Newborns that fall into a deep sleep can stop breathing and pacifiers keep babies sucking and therefore in a lighter stage of sleep. If there is a problem with their airways ,they can more easily wake themselves up! They are safe.
Sucking is soothing! We do it as early as…well…in the womb. The act of sucking helps your baby relax, so that they can go from tired to drowsy to sleeping. Not only is it relaxing, it can give your baby a sense of security and cue sleep. Sucking releases feel good endorphins and promotes a sense of calm.
Non-nutritive sucking is not a replacement for eating however, it’s always important to ensure that baby is not hungry. They will usually let you know by spitting out the pacifier and asking for the real deal!
*If you are breastfeeding, wait until your baby is established and eating on the breast first. For babies that are bottle fed, you can start using a pacifier right away.
So when do things go south?
Your newborn might go to town on the pacifier and it can help them fall asleep, stay asleep and fall into some longer stretches of sleep (remember their sleep cycles haven’t yet developed so it’s a stretch of light and deep sleep that last around 45-50 minutes). Some newborns don’t take the pacifier at all, and that’s okay. I wouldn’t push it on them if they don’t accept it, they can still sleep beautifully without it.
When a baby’s sleep cycles start changing around 4 or 5 months (otherwise knows and the “4 month sleep regression”) a few things happen. They begin having regular wake ups as they come out of one sleep cycle and go into the next (every 2 hours or so). The pacifier falls out and they will NEED that sucking to get them back to sleep. Cue the screaming every few hours for that pacifier. Cue the exhausted, frustrated parent having to go in and replace the pacifier. AGAIN. A pain, I get it. This is when you have two choices:
Work really hard during the day practicing how to put that pacifier in their mouth. Ride it out until baby can find and replace it themselves. This is likely not until around 7 months old. So 2-3 months of fragmented sleep..OR
Wean baby off the pacifier all together. Four/five months is usually about the age you can start implementing some settling techniques that will help baby develop the skills to sleep independently.
You can also wean off the pacifier and then give it back after they can replace it on their own (but if they can sleep independently at this point, you likely won’t ever need it again).
Once a baby can replace it, then it’s your choice to keep it or not. Put a few (many) pacifiers in their crib and let them find it themselves at night. This works great!
I recommend a baby weans off of it by 2 years of age (it only takes one or two rough nights and I can walk you through how to do this).
In the end, pacifiers are live savers if you know WHEN to use them and when to loose them. Losing them requires some work in re-directing that sucking association to something that they can manage on their own, but let me tell you, it’s worth doing. Not only for your sanity and health but for the health and development of your baby, who needs sleep just as much as you do.
If you need a step-by-step plan and coaching to get you there, I’d be happy to get you to a place where you are rested, energized, confident and yourself again!
No more mombie! Not getting help can prolong the damaging effects that long term sleep deprivation can have on your body and mental health as well as, the mood and health of your little one.
Book a free call and lets talk about how I can help introduce or wean that pacifier. Either way. I’ve got you.
**This is not meant as medical advice. Please always talk to your doctor and go in for regular appointments to ensure your baby is gaining weight and healthy.
