Has it been weeks or months and you haven’t seen any improvement in sleep? or you’re seeing some improvements but still not at where you want to be?…maybe it’s time to ask yourself why and re-evaluate what your currently doing.
Here’s the honest truth. Parents often come to me when they are at the end of their rope. Exhausted, sleep deprived and desperate for some relief. They also all notice their baby is also sleep deprived, unhappy, fussier and also just wanting some rest, and they just don’t know how to give it to them.
Many have tried something they found off the internet or in a book and after many weeks or even months of tears, it just isn’t working out.
This is very common unfortunately.
Why? Because babies are humans and each is different and unique. Also, because WE are humans and need some guidance and support (we’re not supposed to know it all) and lastly because sleep is not linear. Sleep is complicated! but if you know how to navigate it, it doesn’t have to be complicated.
Here are the two main reasons why attempts to improve sleep at any age fail:
You don’t have a plan. Having an understanding about sleep is a must but it’s going to get you nowhere without a plan on how you’re going to apply it. Trying to make a change without a plan is like driving to a destination you’ve never been without a map. You always need to know how you’re going to arrive at your destination. Especially when the hardest bumps in the road happen at 3am when you’re not clear headed and yearning for sleep. You’ll often do the easiest thing, even if it’s something that is not sustainable or manageable in the long term.
A plan built out based on goals, taking into consideration the many many factors that affect sleep and the uniqueness of your child and family is KEY.
A plan that aligns with your WHY, why you want to work on sleep, that is easy and clear and that gives you the exact steps on what to do. Even at 3am. That is what is needed for success.
How many of you have wanted to make a change and just justified not doing it in the moment, because it’s too hard or put it off until tomorrow. Only to regret it later because it’s now gone on for longer than it really needs too?
If it’s not written out, it’s not real. This is true for all goals, plans and all things we want to achieve. If you don’t have a plan beforehand, the likely hood that you will execute, even during the hardest times is very low and 90% of the time you will give up
Our brains are wired to giving up easily, it’s normal (but not all right).
I even give my clients back up plan for their plans! That’s right. You will not give up on my watch.
We also work on your mindset, which is 90% of this work (getting rid of that mom guilt, the doubt and the uncertainty), so that you feel comfortable applying your plan without getting stuck.
You don’t have support to carry out that plan. When the going gets tough, who are you going to lean on for support?
You can have the best plan in the world but if you don’t follow it, it will be useless. Once you decide to make a change, it’s important to take action and follow that plan consistently.
Why is this harder for exhausted parents? Well because of the “exhausted” factor. I find having a coach, a support person will get you over the hump needed to achieve success. You are accountable to someone and I make it my mission to get my clients to their goal, fast and on the first try. Results are never dragged out, there is a timeline and they are achieved within that timeline. No giving up and starting again, no wasting time. A clear cut path that guarantees success.
How? through support when you need it most!
We need support. It’s one of the biggest indicators of success. Don’t think that you have to do this alone. Reassurance that you are doing a good job, tweaks along the way and a cheerleader and guide will make the difference between giving in and pushing through.
I focus 100% of my effort on you and your success. Remind you of your why and help navigate the way together, making changes, celebrating successes and getting you to where you want to be in an informed way.
I don’t think it’s necessary for parents to get to the “end of their rope”, it doesn’t need to happen. It is hard work in the short term but nothing worth having comes easy.
We as humans are wired to form habits or associations, as they are the easiest path. This doesn’t mean they always work in our favour, there are a number of habits that we may want to change and the way our child sleeps can be one of them. The good news is that they CAN be changed, with a plan and a little support.
Remember WHY you are doing this, put it on your child’s door on a bright yellow post it note and get it done mama!
I will be in your corner and will see you into dream land, I promise.
Connect with me for that plan and support. You will be glad you didn’t waste any more precious time and sleep.
